You must feel special
because I wrote this about
you,
scribble down marks
and lines to
you.
You always told me
you were never hurt,
and never felt pain.
But then
again,
you said you were ‘fine…’
and then couldn’t finish
that line.
I was so blind to you,
when I was trying
to be kind,
you were ruining my
chance.
When I had such a
stance on myself,
and you were
whispering words
of doubt.
But this is
always about you,
because you never
leave.
I can always feel
you breathing
on my neck.
You must feel special,
because I think
about you.
Every day you
cross my mind,
and even though I’m
behind on life,
I’m always remembering
you.
The amount of times
you told me I was worthless,
and nothing.
And when you cringe today
as I look in the mirror
and think I look okay.
You keep telling me that
I’ll never let you go,
that life would be lonely
without you.
I told myself that I would
never be loved,
and you agreed with me.
I watched myself
disappear,
and you helped to
wash away traces of me.
You’ve always been on
my shoulder,
dragging me down.
You must feel special,
because you’ve been
around for a
long time.
You must feel scared,
because today I wiped
away traces you
were ever here.
I pushed you away.
You are the past,
the past me.
And you’re no longer
welcome
here.